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Chlorophyll Anxiety Crewneck Sweatshirt

This isn’t plant-based calm—it’s root-deep panic.
A chaotic flower face for anyone photosynthesizing straight-up anxiety.
Sales price $39.99

Description

This crewneck is for the green thumbs who are actually just white-knuckling through life. On the front: a spastic, wide-eyed plant that looks like it’s one thought away from full mental combustion. The bold text reads: "You call it chlorophyll, I call it anxiety!"

Because nothing says “healthy” like a flower that’s clearly not.

  • White crewneck with intense hand-drawn detail
  • Text that speaks for every panic-ridden houseplant parent
  • Unhinged garden energy in wearable form

For people who love plants… but mostly relate to their wilting.

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